i spent a little longer on this than i usually do, hope it shows!
and i also hope you enjoy listening!
「いいね！」 6
I usually don’t care for the hard rock/metal vibe, but this song I enjoyed despite that. I found a few of the vocals to be a little awkward in terms of phrasing, but on the other hand it might fit better with the style to have it that way. Also I like your lyrics. 
「いいね！」 1
thanks a lot! and i had trouble getting various phrasings to fit into the melody in the first half so it’s a little awkward at times. it mostly comes down to me being a mediocre writer 
if anything stood out as awkward in the second half that would be intentional though~
i’ve only done vocals for a bit over a year, so maybe ill improve yet!